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#50: Use Dialogue Tags for Rhythm and Cadence

January 19, 2022/0 Comments/in Jane Austen Writing Lessons /by Katherine Cowley

In Northanger Abbey, Catherine Morland and her friend Isabella Thorpe are conversing in the Pump-Room, a building in the town of Bath that was a popular gathering place. For quite some time, they are watched by several men, but then the men leave. Isabella pretends that she is grateful for their departure; however, she is actually disappointed that they have left and secretly wants to follow them.

Isabella says:

“Well, I am amazingly glad I have got rid of them! And now, what say you to going to Edgar’s Buildings with me, and looking at my new hat? You said you should like to see it.”

Catherine readily agreed. “Only,” she added, “perhaps we may overtake the two young men.”

The key dialogue tag in this passage is she added. As we discussed in the previous lesson on dialogue tags, she added could be considered a functional dialogue tag, a dialogue tag which shows how what the character is saying is functioning within the larger conversation. First Catherine agrees with her friend, and then what she says adds to—and modifies—her previous statement.

Yet she added is doing more than just telling us the role that her statement plays in the conversation. Its placement controls the rhythm of the paragraph and indicates the cadence of Catherine’s speech.

Jane Austen regularly uses dialogue tags for rhythm and cadence, and doing so is a powerful tool that can be used in any fictional genre.

Let’s define rhythm and cadence as we’ll use them in this lesson.

Definitions: Rhythm and Cadence in Dialogue

Rhythm in dialogue: patterns of language and sound in a passage which create an underlying beat. Jane Austen Writing Lessons

Rhythm is patterns of language and sound in a passage which create an underlying beat. Poetry sometimes uses strict meters, or rhythm patterns, but there is rhythm in prose as well, and the beat and speed and emphasis created by the rhythm in prose effects both the feel and the speed at which we read. Rhythm is particularly important as we consider dialogue, for dialogue is meant to be spoken aloud. Rhythm can have a powerful effect on the reader both when a beat is created or when it is broken—interrupted.

Cadence is how a person’s voice changes as they speak, both rising and lowering. In most cases, a speaker’s voice is not level or flat across a passage of dialogue: tone and pitch and emphasis change with the content of what someone is saying, and how they feel about it.

Much of the rhythm and cadence of a passage of dialogue is determined by the words and phrasing of the dialogue itself, however, rhythm and cadence can also be impacted by the dialogue tags.

Let’s consider again the line from Northanger Abbey:

Catherine readily agreed. “Only,” she added, “perhaps we may overtake the two young men.”

We can almost hear Catherine’s cadence as we read. She agrees with her friend, probably saying something like, “Of course, I would love to join you.” And then we have an “Only,” she added. It reads almost as an interruption—she’s likely raised her voice slightly, and she’s pausing after it, as if she has just realized the problem with Isabella’s proposal.

During Isabella’s statement—the proposal of activities—and Catherine readily agreed we have a steady rhythm, almost a beat. It’s smooth, nothing accentuated. But then “Only,” she added breaks the smooth rhythm—the forced pause is like an orchestra suddenly stopping all sound for a beat, which adds emphasis to what comes after.

Dialogue Tag Placement

One of the most common techniques that Jane Austen uses to control rhythm and cadence is to choose where to use a dialogue tag, whether it’s a he said, said Catherine, or an action that substitutes for a dialogue tag.

Consider the following passage of dialogue, from the first time that Catherine Morland and Mr. Tilney meet at a ball:

Mr. Tilney was polite enough to seem interested in what she said; and she kept him on the subject of muslins till the dancing recommenced. Catherine feared, as she listened to their discourse, that he indulged himself a little too much with the foibles of others. – “What are you thinking of so earnestly?” said he, as they walked back to the ball-room;—“not of your partner, I hope, for by that shake of the head, your meditations are not satisfactory.”

Catherine coloured, and said, “I was not thinking of any thing.”

“That is artful and deep, to be sure; but I had rather be told at once that you will not tell me.”

If a dialogue tag is used, there are three primary places where it can be placed: before the dialogue, partway through the dialogue (often after a word, sentence, or phrase), and after the dialogue.

One approach that Austen particularly seems to favor is providing the tag partway through the dialogue. This allows a build-up before the dialogue tag—we’re interested in what is being said. Then we are given a physical pause or beat that also serves to provide who is speaking and sometimes how they are speaking or what they are doing. This is followed by more dialogue, which completes the character’s self-expression.

Instead of placing the dialogue tag in the middle of the paragraph, Austen could have written:

As they walked back to the ballroom, Mr. Tilney said, “What are you thinking of so earnestly? Not of your partner, I hope, for by that shake of the head, your meditations are not satisfactory.”

This eliminates the pause after his question—he immediately says the next statement. It also eliminates some of the implied cadence—modulation of his tone—in his question.

The dialogue tag could also have been placed at the end:

“What are you thinking of so earnestly? Not of your partner, I hope, for by that shake of the head, your meditations are not satisfactory,” said Mr. Tilney as they walked back to the ballroom.

Often, a dialogue tag at the end works best for shorter pieces of dialogue—we don’t want to read five or six sentences of dialogue, and then find out who is speaking. This dialogue is of a length that works well with the tag at the end, but it has a different rhythm than what Austen has chosen:

“What are you thinking of so earnestly?” said he, as they walked back to the ball-room;—“not of your partner, I hope, for by that shake of the head, your meditations are not satisfactory.”

Now consider the placement of the dialogue tag in Catherine’s response:

Catherine coloured, and said, “I was not thinking of any thing.”

In part, placing it at the start is necessary, because Catherine blushes as an immediate response to his statement, and then she speaks. However, placing it at the start also impacts how we understand her tone and her volume—we assume she is embarrassed, and likely speaking more quietly, and more quickly, than earlier.

Unnecessary (Yet Rhythmically Appropriate) Dialogue Tags

Another technique that Austen uses is to incorporate dialogue tags that, strictly speaking, are unnecessary—we already know who is speaking, and the dialogue tag doesn’t provide information about the function of the dialogue, how the dialogue is spoken, what emotion is used, etc. Yet these “unnecessary” dialogue tags are used to impact either the rhythm, the cadence, or both.

Later in Northanger Abbey, John Thorpe decides to take Catherine Morland’s future into his own hands. He knows that Catherine has plans to do something with the Tilneys, but he wants Catherine to do something with him, so he goes to the Tilney’s and cancels Catherine’s engagement. He then informs Catherine that she is now available to do something with him:

“Now, my sweet Catherine, all our distresses are over; you are honourably acquitted, and we shall have a most delightful party.”

“This will not do,” said Catherine; “I cannot submit to this. I must run after Miss Tilney directly and set her right.”

The phrase said Catherine is unnecessary—it is clear that Catherine is speaking, and she just been directly addressed by Mr. Thorpe, so readers will assume that the next dialogue is Catherine’s. And, as discussed in the previous lesson on dialogue tags, Austen often omits dialogue tags in cases like this when it is clear who is speaking.

Yet including the dialogue effects the rhythm—we feel Catherine’s pause after her statement, which punctuates both “This will not do” and “I cannot submit to this.” It also affects her cadence. When I read this passage aloud, I naturally read “This will do not do” at a standard tone, and then I read “I cannot submit to this” a little higher and faster.

In Conclusion: The Power of Dialogue Tags

Dialogue tags are powerful. They can:

Attribute dialogue to a speaker
Indicate the function of a line of dialogue within a passage
Show how someone is speaking
Convey the emotion of a speaker or listener
Describe the actions that are taken in conjunction with the dialogue

And, as discussed in this lesson, dialogue tags can also

Impact the rhythm of the passage
Shift the cadence of the speakers

In the following passage, the dialogue tags do all of these things.

While walking on the street, Catherine has just run into her brother, James Morland, and his friend, John Thorpe. The men are theoretically speaking to Catherine, but they are truly speaking to each other:

[John Thorpe] took out his watch: “How long do you think we have been running it from Tetbury, Miss Morland?”

“I do not know the distance.” Her brother told her that it was twenty-three miles.

“Three-and-twenty!” cried Thorpe; “five-and-twenty if it is an inch.” Morland remonstrated, pleaded the authority of roadbooks, innkeepers, and milestones; but his friend disregarded them all; he had a surer test of distance. “I know it must be five-and-twenty,” said he, “by the time we have been doing it. It is now half after one; we drove out of the inn-yard at Tetbury as the town-clock struck eleven; and I defy any man in England to make my horse go less than ten miles an hour in harness; that makes it exactly twenty-five.”

“You have lost an hour,” said Morland; “it was only ten o’clock when we came from Tetbury.”

“Ten o’clock! it was eleven, upon my soul! I counted every stroke. This brother of yours would persuade me out of my senses, Miss Morland; do but look at my horse; did you ever see an animal so made for speed in your life?” (The servant had just mounted the carriage and was driving off.) “Such true blood! Three hours and a half indeed coming only three-and-twenty miles! look at that creature, and suppose it possible if you can.”

Writing Exercises - Jane Austen Writing Lessons

Exercise 1: Playing with another author’s dialogue tags

Another author… what types of dialogue tags do they use. Choose a passage with multiple dialogue tags and read it aloud. Now rewrite the passage with moved to different places and read it aloud.

Exercise 2: Every possible variation

Write a snatch of dialogue—one to three sentences of a single character speaking. Now try to create as many variations of it as possible without changing the words of the dialogue itself.

Things you can vary:

Placement of dialogue tag (beginning, middle, end)
Type of dialogue tag (said, a functional dialogue tag like replied or added, a descriptive dialogue like whispered)
Conveying emotion or how the character is speaking through the dialogue tag
Using adverbs or character actions
Using no dialogue tag at all

How many variations were you able to create? Read them aloud and consider how it affects the interpretation of the dialogue, as well as the rhythm and the cadence. Now choose your favorite. (Note: it’s normally important to consider the context—the passage or scene as a whole—when choosing how to use dialogue tags for a single unit of dialogue.)

Exercise 3: Adjusting your own rhythm and cadence

Choose a scene that you have written in a short story or novel which includes between two and four paragraphs or lines of sequential dialogue. Rewrite the passage to create a different rhythm and cadence. Now read aloud the original version followed by the new version. Which do you prefer and why?

#49: When to Use Dialogue Tags (and How)

January 5, 2022/0 Comments/in Jane Austen Writing Lessons /by Katherine Cowley

Jane Austen is a master of dialogue, and the next series of lessons will focus on what we can learn from Jane Austen on writing dialogue in fiction. This post will specifically address when to use dialogue tags—and how.

While dialogue tags are often taught as an introductory writing technique, Austen uses them in advanced ways, to control rhythm and cadence, and to convey emotion and conflict. Many times, she chooses to forgo dialogue tags entirely. We’ll start with a basic definition of dialogue tags, analyze her sophisticated use of tags in a passage from Pride and Prejudice, and consider the question of when to use dialogue tags, and when to omit them entirely.

Dialogue Tag Definition. Dialogue: a phrase that identifies the speaker of a passage of dialogue

A dialogue tag is a phrase that identifies the speaker of a passage of dialogue.

In English, the most commonly used dialogue tag is the word “said” accompanied by the name of a character or a pronoun.

Often dialogue tags are used for clarity and to prevent confusion. Dialogue tags can also be used to add a pause, or to describe how or why a character is speaking.

Instead of using a dialogue tag, an action beat can be used—if a character is acting or doing something, then we assume that the dialogue within the passage also belongs to them.

Dialogue Tag Example: The Meryton Assembly

The Meryton assembly is the first time that we meet the single and ever-so-desirable characters, Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy.

Consider the use of dialogue tags and action beats in this passage in which Mr. Bingley attempts to convince Mr. Darcy to dance:

“Come, Darcy,” said he, “I must have you dance. I hate to see you standing about by yourself in this stupid manner. You had much better dance.”

“I certainly shall not. You know how I detest it, unless I am particularly acquainted with my partner. At such an assembly as this, it would be insupportable. Your sisters are engaged, and there is not another woman in the room whom it would not be a punishment to me to stand up with.”

“I would not be so fastidious as you are,” cried Bingley, “for a kingdom! Upon my honour, I never met with so many pleasant girls in my life as I have this evening; and there are several of them you see uncommonly pretty.”

“You are dancing with the only handsome girl in the room,” said Mr. Darcy, looking at the eldest Miss Bennet.

“Oh! she is the most beautiful creature I ever beheld! But there is one of her sisters sitting down just behind you, who is very pretty, and I dare say very agreeable. Do let me ask my partner to introduce you.”

“Which do you mean?” and turning round, he looked for a moment at Elizabeth, till catching her eye, he withdrew his own and coldly said, “She is tolerable; but not handsome enough to tempt me; and I am in no humour at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. You had better return to your partner and enjoy her smiles, for you are wasting your time with me.”

In this passage, there are three dialogue tags which use said: said he, said Mr. Darcy, and coldly said. There is one dialogue tag which uses a different verb: cried Bingley. This shows both Mr. Bingley’s emotion and the manner in which he is speaking. There is one spot where an action beat is used instead of a dialogue tag: “Which do you mean?” and turning round, he looked for a moment at Elizabeth… (This phrasing works well in Pride and Prejudice, but as a note, modern dialogue conventions often—but not always—split the action beat into a separate sentence. If this convention was used, this paragraph could be written something like: “Which do you mean?” He turned round and looked for a moment at Elizabeth.)

Using Said vs. Other Dialogue Tags

The author Elliott Slaughter performed a study of dialogue tags, and one of the texts that he analyzed was Pride and Prejudice. He found that 50% of Austen’s dialogue tags used the word “said.”

In English, “said” is seen as an invisible dialogue tag. It does its job, assigning dialogue to the speaker, but we aren’t meant to really notice or pay attention to it. Often, we don’t want the reader to be focusing on the dialogue tag—we want them to focus on the dialogue itself, and strong dialogue often gives a feel of how the speaker is speaking on its own, without extra description. In the brilliant book Craft in the Real World, Matthew Salesses explains that said being seen as invisible is just a cultural convention, and is not inherently better or right. Non-native English speakers sometimes find the constant use of the word said to be jarring, while those who have read hundreds of books in English become used to it.

Endless authors and books on writing recommend that writers primarily use the word said in dialogue tags, and to use other verbs minimally or not at all. Largely, I agree—a lot of the time, you do want the dialogue tag to be invisible, and if you’re constantly using other verbs, it can distract or become annoying. Yet when we read Pride and Prejudice we can see how effectively Austen uses other dialogue tags.

According to Elliott Slaughter, while 50% of Austen’s dialogue tags use the word said, 32% of the time she uses “functional dialogue tags”—tags which “indicate the function or role of a piece of dialogue.” The functional dialogue tags Austen uses include replied, added, continued, thought, repeated, and answered. Another common functional dialogue tag in fiction is asked. 18% of the time Austen uses “descriptive dialogue tags”—“verbs that describe the manner, mood or inflection of the speech and not simply its function or form.” The descriptive dialogue tags used by Austen include cried, observed, exclaimed, called, and whispered.

In a previous Jane Austen Writing Lesson, I talked in more depth about how characters say lines of dialogue; one method of doing so is to incorporate actions or adverbs. The only thing I’ll add here is an extra detail from Slaughter’s study—at 14 points in Pride and Prejudice, Austen uses an adverb to describe how someone says something. The adverbs she uses include impatiently, warmly, drily, stoutly, and resentfully.

In the passage between Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley, there were two paragraphs of dialogue that did not include any dialogue tags or action beats. The paragraph that begins “I certainly shall not” is Mr. Darcy’s dialogue, while the paragraph that begins “Oh! she is the most beautiful creature I ever beheld!” is Mr. Bingley’s.

Omitting a dialogue tag focuses the reader on what the characters are saying, and it increases the pace by which we read the dialogue. In Austen’s novels, dialogue tags are used only if they are necessary for comprehension, if they will positively impact the rhythm or cadence, or if they truly add something to the reader’s understanding of the characters and their conversation. The rest of the time, she does not include dialogue tags.

In Elliott Slaughter’s study on dialogue tags in Pride and Prejudice, he found that for 51% of the dialogue, Austen does not use a dialogue tag or any sort of attribution. This is especially common during conversations between two characters. In some passages, the identity of the speakers will be made clear once, either at the start of the conversation or in the actions before the conversation, and then Austen will give five, six, or ten lines of dialogue without any tags or attributions. While it’s easiest to omit dialogue tags if there are only two characters, Austen often omits tags in conversations with larger groups of characters.

In a later scene in Pride and Prejudice, Mr. Darcy’s makes a declaration on Mr. Bingley’s tractability, and then we read:

“You have only proved by this,” cried Elizabeth, “that Mr. Bingley did not do justice to his own disposition. You have shown him off now much more than he did himself.”

“I am exceedingly gratified,” said Bingley, “by your converting what my friend says into a compliment on the sweetness of my temper. But I am afraid you are giving it a turn which that gentleman did by no means intend; for he would certainly think the better of me, if under such a circumstance I were to give a flat denial, and ride off as fast as I could.”

“Would Mr. Darcy then consider the rashness of your original intention as atoned for by your obstinacy in adhering to it?”

“Upon my word, I cannot exactly explain the matter, Darcy must speak for himself.”

“You expect me to account for opinions which you choose to call mine, but which I have never acknowledged. Allowing the case, however, to stand according to your representation, you must remember, Miss Bennet, that the friend who is supposed to desire his return to the house, and the delay of his plan, has merely desired it, asked it without offering one argument in favour of its propriety.”

“To yield readily—easily—to the persuasion of a friend is no merit with you.”

“To yield without conviction is no compliment to the understanding of either.”

The first two paragraphs include dialogue tags, for Elizabeth and Mr. Bingley, but then the rest of this dialogue we can assume by context that the lines belong to Elizabeth, Mr. Bingley, Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth, and then Mr. Darcy. Descriptions of how these characters are speaking is not necessary—we know them and can make assumptions on their tone and mannerisms based solely on what they say.

There are a few places in Pride and Prejudice where the speaker is unclear, which has led to rather exciting scholarly debates. In a letter about Pride and Prejudice which Jane Austen wrote to her sister Cassandra, she said,

There are a few typical errors; and a “said he,” or a “said she,” would sometimes make the dialogue more immediately clear; but “I do not write for such dull elves” as have not a great deal of ingenuity themselves.

While Austen wished she had added a few more uses of “said he” and “said she,” the fact is that there are 633 lines of dialogue in Pride and Prejudice which do not include dialogue tags, and, with a few possible exceptions, they are not necessary in these passages. As you consider what sorts of dialogue tags you want to use in your own writing, consider also when to use dialogue tags, and when to omit them.

Exercise 1: Dialogue Analysis

Choose a book that you admire written by an author who is not Jane Austen. Take a scene or a chapter and analyze the author’s use of dialogue tags. How often do they use the verb said? Do they also use other verbs as dialogue tags? Are action beats used instead of, or in addition to, dialogue tags. Are adverbs or other descriptions of how the character speak used? How often are dialogue tags omitted?

Exercise 2: Omitting Dialogue Tags

Take a scene of dialogue you have written and see how dialogue tags and action beats you can remove without making it unclear who is speaking.

Exercise 3: Dialogue as Style

How you use dialogue tags is an extension of your style as a writer—the choices you consistently make contribute to the overall style of the text. Write a brief scene of dialogue between two to four characters. Now, revise the scene using two different dialogue tag styles. Here are a few options:

Style 1: Use only invisible dialogue tags (i.e. said) and omit other dialogue tags.
Style 2: Lean heavy on action beats, though other dialogue tags are allowed.
Style 3: Jane Austen style. Omit about half the dialogue tags; when you do use dialogue tags, have about half of them be the verb said and half be other verbs.
Style 4: Wide range of tags. Use at least one said, one functional dialogue tag (i.e. asked, replied, etc.), one descriptive dialogue tag (i.e. cried, whispered, exclaimed, or said + adverb), and one action beat.
Style 5: Another approach to dialogue tags of your choosing.