#3: Use an Inciting Incident to Set the Plot in Motion
One of my all-time favorite films is Austenland. It’s a comedy about a woman named Jane who spends her savings to stay at an all-inclusive, Jane Austen-themed resort. At one point in the film, she and another character, Mr. Nobley, find themselves running.
Mr. Nobley asks, “Why are we running?”
Jane replies, “Because a man and a woman should never be alone unless they are in motion.”
Just like characters in the Regency period (or anyone in an immersive Jane Austen experience), stories themselves should not be at rest.
Stories are generally about motion, they are about change and development, both in terms of character and plot. Yet as humans, we are stationary beings. We do what we have been doing: we stay still, or, if we have a path, we stick to that path unless something changes.
An inciting incident is an event that carries weight for the main character and creates the opportunity for change, both internally and externally. An inciting incident often introduces forces outside of the main character’s control, and is a disruption that requires the main character to adapt and grow and interact with others in new ways. An inciting incident often relates, in some way, to the main themes or conflicts of the novel.
1884 cover of Sense and Sensibility, from the British Library
In Sense and Sensibility, Mr. Dashwood’s death changes everything for Mrs. Dashwood and her daughters, Elinor, Marianne, and Margaret. Yet for a time, they stay in stasis, continuing to live on the estate that has been their home. Yet it is no longer really their home: Mrs. Dashwood’s stepson, Mr. John Dashwood, and his wife, Fanny Dashwood, are the new owners. Fanny in particular makes the elder Mrs. Dashwood and her daughters unwelcome, especially once she notices that her brother, Edward Ferrars, is interested in Elinor. She rudely confronts Mrs. Dashwood on the subject, and Mrs. Dashwood decides that they will withdraw from the estate:
To quit the neighborhood of Norland was no longer an evil; it was an object of desire; it was a blessing, in comparison of the misery of continuing her daughter-in-law’s guest: and to remove for ever from that beloved place would be less painful than to inhabit or visit it while such a woman was its mistress.
As they leave, Marianne wails a lament:
“Dear, dear Norland! when shall I cease to regret you!—when learn to feel a home elsewhere!—Oh! happy house, could you know what I suffer in now viewing you from this spot, from whence perhaps I may view you no more!….you will remain the same; unconscious of the pleasure or the regret you occasion, and insensible of any change in those who walk under your shade!—But who will remain to enjoy you?”
This forced eviction takes the Dashwoods on a physical journey—to a new county, where they live in a cottage and meet a whole set of new people. In addition to a physical journey, it’s also a journey to try to find home and to see if they can survive losing almost everything that they find dear. This journey starts both Marianne and Elinor on internal journeys; Marianne is full of sensibility and unrestrained emotion, but must learn how to let more than her emotions govern her; Elinor has a bit too much sense, and keeps too much inside her, not allowing herself to want and hope for the things she really desires.
While some inciting incidents lead to physical journeys, like in Sense and Sensibility, a physical journey is not required. For instance, in Emma the inciting incident is the marriage of Emma’s governess. Emma’s internal and external journeys are captivating, but they do not require her to leave her home (the furthest she goes is Box Hill, which is only seven miles away).
Change is at the heart of interesting plots, and the possibility for change is why we root for characters. A good inciting incident sets the plot in motion and paves the way for the rest of the story.
Exercise 1: Choose one of your favorite books or movies. What is the inciting incident? How does this event change things for the main character and start them on a journey? Share your thoughts in the comments.
Exercise 2: In the following paragraph, a character is pursuing something she wants: the opportunity to be the pianist for the high school musical. Add an inciting incident, something that will disrupt and change things for Luciana. For the purposes of this exercise, keep it short—anywhere from a sentence to a full paragraph. Once you’ve written the inciting incident, consider how it would change the character’s trajectory and what sort of story might result from it.
Luciana ran her fingers up and down the keys of an imaginary piano. She had been preparing for this audition for months, and now the time had finally come. She closed the book and looked at her hands. They were warm, they were flexible, and they were ready. She would be chosen as the accompanist for the high school musical this year, surely. She waited impatiently for her turn on the grand piano, but she need not have worried. Luciana played the music flawlessly, and the music director gave her an assuring smile as she left the room.
Exercise 3: Take a new story idea, one that you haven’t yet developed. Spend a few minutes brainstorming an inciting incident, or, if you prefer discovery writing, write an opening scene and see what inciting incident will put your character in motion or change her direction.
#2: Combine Multiple Elements to Create an Engaging Premise
There’s a popular Studio C comedy skit called “Teddy’s Story Joint.” In it, authors go to a story restaurant and buy their plots. The first author to visit is Jane Austen, who says, “I’d like a plot today. The usual.”
A new employee asks her boss, “What’s the usual?”
He explains what Jane Austen is looking for: “Girl likes a guy. Looks like she won’t get the guy, but then she does.” He turns to Jane Austen and asks, “With the witty social critique on the side?”
Jane Austen smiles and says, “You know how I like it.”
Arguably, there might only be seven basic plots, but obviously there’s a lot more to Jane Austen than this very basic plot structure found at the core of her novels. How do you do this in your own writing: how can you make your stories different from all the other stories out there?
While almost every idea has been “done before” in some way or another, if you’re brainstorming or developing a concept it’s useful to combine multiple elements to create an engaging and original premise.
Take Jane Austen’s Persuasion as an example. Yes, it’s a love story with hiccups—but it’s so much more than that.
Here are some of the key elements that together make it a fascinating premise:
The two penguins fighting over Wentworth’s heart are Louisa and Henrietta Musgrove. Anne Elliot is the penguin on the top left, trying hard to not watch. (Penguins from the California Academy of Sciences.)
Persuasion incorporates lost love, jealousy, longing, misunderstandings, the pain of betrayal, and family conflict. It’s an engaging concept, even when written in bullet point form. The elements are distinctive and focused, they can be explained quickly and easily, and they paint a picture of the character, plot, and conflict.
How do you create an engaging premise or concept?
Take the kernel of your story idea—whether it’s a character, a plot idea, a situation, a setting—and start combining it with other things. Consider what happens if you put the story in a different time, use a different genre, or add a different subplot. What happens if you change a key detail about one of the characters? Once you start getting excited about the concept, then you know you have something worth writing.
Exercise 1:
Play the story element mix-up game below. First, choose a genre, then select a main character and a plot element. Add details and craft a pitch for the story’s premise.
As an example, I have selected the following elements:
- Historical fiction
- Person crossed in love
- Helping an old woman and receiving a gift
Now I will add some additional details in order to craft a story premise:
The widow Lady Gertrude thought she had found love again, but the charming Mr. Wenton was actually a swindler who robbed her of 1000 pounds. Now she is fighting to keep her deceased husband’s estate, while struggling to help the ailing, old housekeeper, Mrs. Winter. Lady Gertrude cares for Mrs. Winter personally, and with her dying breaths Mrs. Winter tells her the location of hidden chest. Inside, Lady Gertrude discovers a family secret: a record of her deceased husband’s disinherited cousin, the scarred and troubled Colonel Anthrop, who may hold the key to saving both the estate and Lady Gertrude’s broken heart.
If you would like to do the exercise more than once, use the birth month and name of a friend, or change the genre. (Or go rogue and choose whichever elements from the chart you would like!)
If I were to create a story premise with the same components but a different genre (superhero), my story premise might look like this:
Angela moves to a small town in the upper peninsula of Michigan to escape her past—and her cheating ex-boyfriend. As she’s moving into an old, one-bedroom apartment, she helps an old woman with her groceries. The brownies the old woman gives her as a thank-you give Angela superpowers, including the ability to sense when a crime is being committed. Soon she discovers a conspiracy involving the famous Tahquamenon Falls, and Angela must use her powers to save her newfound community.
Exercise 2
Brainstorm a list of story ideas. These do not have to be fully developed story ideas—rather, they can be interesting story elements. The film director Michael Rabiger recommends keeping a CLOSAT journal, where you record interesting Characters, Locations, Objects, Situations, Acts, and Themes. These can be from life, from your imagination, from other stories or art, from the news, etc. Once you find a story element you really like, see what you can combine it with to develop a story.
Exercise 3
If you are already working on a short story or a novel, practice writing an elevator pitch: a short, 1-2 sentence pitch about your story that you could give to someone in the length of time you would spend with them in an elevator. Consider which core elements make your premise unique and compelling, and see if you can capture the core conflict of the story in your pitch. As a bonus challenge, pitch your story idea to five different people.
#1: Make Your Character Want Something
The key components of story: plot character
At the heart of any story are two fundamental components: character and plot. There is a lot of debate about whether character or plot is more important, and both need to be addressed at every stage of the writing process. Yet there is an underlying principle that distills both character and plot.
Your main character needs to want something.
In Jane Austen’s novel Emma, the main character, Emma Woodhouse, wants to bring others happiness (and herself entertainment) by playing matchmaker. At the beginning of the book she sets herself on this path while speaking of her success in matching her dear friend and governess, Miss Taylor, to Mr. Weston:
“I made the match myself. I made the match, you know, four years ago; and to have it take place, and be proved in the right, when so many people said Mr. Weston would never marry again, may comfort me for any thing.”
Mr. Knightley shook his head at her. Her father fondly replied, “Ah! my dear, I wish you would not make matches and foretell things, for whatever you say always comes to pass. Pray do not make any more matches.”
“I promise you to make none for myself, papa; but I must, indeed, for other people. It is the greatest amusement in the world! And after such success you know!”
Illustration by C.E. Brock, from a 1909 edition of Emma
The wants of a character reveal their internal character and personality.
Emma believes she can be a matchmaker because she believes she understands people better than they understand themselves. Not only does she find herself superior to others, but she is used to getting what she wants.
The wants of a character create plot.
Emma’s desire to make matches leads to most of the action (and comedy) of the novel, such as her prolonged attempt to set her friend Harriet Smith up with the vicar, Mr. Elton.
Whether you’re brainstorming or revising a story, make sure your main character wants something, and that this want is manifest throughout the narrative.
How do you show character wants and motivations?
One of the most powerful ways to show what a character wants is through their dialogue, as seen in the example from Emma. Dialogue is not just about communication: it is a tool we use to assert our identities in the world, to create change, and to influence other characters.
What a character wants should also be shown through action. Emma arranges endless opportunities for Harriet and Mr. Elton to spend time together. At one point she is on a walk with them and she intentionally breaks her shoelace so she can fall behind, giving them the opportunity to be alone.
A further method that can be used to show character wants and motivation is through description. Emma notices every time Mr. Elton looks in Harriet’s direction, and the description reflects her motivation and hopes.
Exercise 1: Think of one of your favorite books or movies. What does the main character really want? Share your response in the comments.
Exercise 2: Whether you’re writing a novel, a short story, or a picture book, your main character should want something. Write a manifesto from their point of view about what they want, why they want it, and what they are willing to do to get it. This could be a single paragraph or a full page.
Exercise 3: Rewrite the following short scene about a woman named Mariah. The catch: you must add a strong character want. This could be any want, in any genre. For example:
- To be a matchmaker
- To find a valuable clue that will help her stop an assassin
- To be on time to something in her life, for once
Whether you choose one of these sample wants or your own, the character’s want should have an impact on the dialogue, the action, and the description.
Mariah walked up to the ticket counter. “One ticket for Ocean’s 8. The 7:00.”
The man at the counter nodded, not even looking up at her. As he made the selections on his computer, her eyes fell on his name tag. “Markus.” Her eyes moved back up to his face, and this time, she looked past the glasses and the beard. It really was Markus. She hadn’t seen him in years, not since high school graduation.
“Markus Santos?”
At this, he looked up from the screen. It took a moment, but realization dawned on his face. “Mariah. How are you?”
“Pretty good. How about you?”
“Great,” he said, but not very convincingly. “That’ll be $10.25.”
She inserted her credit card.
“Are you seeing this by yourself?” he asked.
“No, I’m meeting friends. They already have their tickets.”
She removed her credit card and he handed her the ticket.
“Have a nice night,” he said with a nod. There was no trace of the smiles he used to give to everyone.
“You too,” she said. She entered the theater.
Introduction to Jane Austen Writing Lessons
It is a truth universally acknowledged that if you wish to write well, you should learn from the very best writers.
In other words, you should read Jane Austen.
I do not find this to be a great sacrifice.
Elizabeth Bennet in the 2005 film adaptation of Pride and Prejudice
Jane Austen Writing Lessons
I am a writing teacher by profession and a long-time Janeite. Jane Austen Writing Lessons is my attempt to combine these two interests by creating a series of writing lessons based on the books of Jane Austen.
What will these lessons look like?
Each writing lesson will focus on a principle of creative writing. I will address how to use this principle, examine how Jane Austen uses the principle in one of her works, and then provide writing exercises that apply the principle. While the examples draw from the writings of Jane Austen and other Austen-inspired works, the principles can be applied to writing in any genre, and the writing exercises provide the opportunity to apply these principles in a variety of ways.
The first ten lessons address big picture principles for writing. After that, sets of lessons will go into depth on specific topics, like dialogue.
The Benefits of Writing Exercises
Musicians practice scales to teach their fingers to move in certain patterns. The coach of a sports team runs drills to prepare the players for different things that might happen on the field or on the court.
Writing exercises fulfill the same purpose: they are a chance to exercise or practice a principle in order to internalize it and be prepared to use it appropriately in your writing.
In my years of teaching writing, I have found that learning about a principle is rarely enough. Writers learn the principles best when they practice them, and writing exercises are an easy, contained way to do this.
Who Am I?
I have an MA in Rhetoric and Composition and focused my studies on the teaching of writing. I have taught writing classes at Mesa Community College and Brigham Young University, and I currently teach writing at Western Michigan University.
My debut novel, The Secret Life of Miss Mary Bennet, will be released in April 2021 by Tule Publishing. I also have over a dozen published short stories and novellas.
Visit the Jane Austen Writing Lessons homepage to view all of the writing lessons index.
The Mary Bennet Draft from COVID-19
I recently got a three-book deal for the trilogy which begins with The Secret Life of Miss Mary Bennet. Which means I sold one completed book, one partially completed book, and one book that exists entirely in my imagination.
The partially completed book is currently known as Mary Bennet Book 2. Clever, I know. Fortuitously, I had accidentally written a first draft of book 2 while I was writing the first draft of book 1. When I got to the end of the draft, I realized it had two sets of characters, two completely different locations, two mysteries, two internal characters arcs… I had written two books, which I proceeded to chop in half. (Accidentally writing a draft is highly recommend, because you get two drafts for the price of one.)
So fast-forward to January 2020, when we were all naive and thought this year would be a lot more pleasant than it has turned out to be. My agent was sending out my first book to publishing houses, but she had the descriptions for books 2 and 3 on hand in case any of the publishers were interested in the whole series. This provided great motivation for me to make progress on book 2.
I opened the file for book 2. I already knew it was missing a few main characters that needed to be a part of the book, but as I looked at it, I realized that it had no plot. I mean, things happened, including two awesome spying-at-ball scenes, an explosion, mistaken identities, a conspiracy, etc. etc. etc. But still, there was no plot, no overarching mystery strong enough to hold all these cool scenes and ideas and subplots together.
And so I began the lengthy process of outlining, researching, plotting, deleting, and writing.
January. February. March. April. May. June. Goals I set for myself came and went. My kids were sent home from school. My part-time job (teaching first-year writing at WMU) went from in-person to online. Michigan had weeks where we had hundreds of COVID-19 deaths every single day. I struggled with anxiety about life, the universe, and everything. And still I put what I could into this book, even when it wasn’t much. I woke up at 6 a.m. almost every day of the year so I could sneak in some writing before the kids woke up, and I wrote during their afternoon movie time. It felt like I was building a mountain, one tiny spoonful of dirt at a time. But it added up.
I don’t think I’ve ever deleted quite so much in a draft. There was a full chapter I deleted and a number of other scenes, but most of the deletions came from deleted paragraphs and sentences.
206 hours is also the most time I have ever spent on a draft. Previously, the longest draft had taken 110 hours. (The first draft of Mary Bennet 1 took 140 hours, but as I mentioned before, it was actually the first draft of 2 books.)
COVID-19 definitely made this draft harder to write, but honestly, it was a challenging draft even in January and February. I can attribute this to three factors:
- I have become a better writer
As I revised the first Mary Bennet book, I learned a lot about plot and character and the mystery genre. Which meant that I had a whole new bunch of tools and lenses to take to this book–which meant that I could see how far it was from what it could become, and knew a lot of what it would take to get there. In my case, becoming a better writer has not made me a faster writer.
- I was doing complicated/challenging things
In Mary Bennet 2, I’m doing some complicated things structurally, and I have a large cast of characters. I have a number of chapters where I have 10 important characters in play and am interweaving the plot and three or four subplots at the same time. This is insane, I do not recommend it, and it challenged me as a writer. Also, these scenes are some of the best in the book.
- It took an eternity to figure out the ending
I am an outliner, but I still figure out a lot of things about what works and what doesn’t through the process of writing. I outlined before the first draft, and I outlined before the second draft, but for the life of me, I could not figure out the ending. (I knew who the villain was and a few key components that needed to be in there, but nothing else.) And I spent months thinking about the ending as I revised the other chapters and added new material. In a very uncharacteristic move for me (proud outliner that I am) I did not actually figure out the ending until it was time to write it.
Now that draft two of Mary Bennet Book 2 is done, I’ve sent it off to several critique partners. Then it will be another round of edits (theoretically less painful) and then another before I turn it in to the publisher.
Meanwhile, I should be getting feedback from my editor soon on the first book, The Secret Life of Miss Mary Bennet. I’m really excited to edit it and get it ready for its release in April 2021.
I Got a Book Deal!
There is no way for me to express my excitement for the news I am about to share, so I will simply share it: I have a three-book deal with Tule Publishing!
My incredible agent, Stephany Evans, negotiated a three-book deal with Tule for The Secret Life of Miss Mary Bennet and its two sequels. The Secret Life of Miss Mary Bennet will be published in Spring 2021, and the second and third books will be published in 2022.
Here’s the blurb for the first book:
Of the five Bennet sisters, Jane is beautiful, Elizabeth is clever, and Kitty and Lydia are silly. Mary is the dull, plain sister . . . or so she wants everyone to think. She is actually a spy.
After Mr. Bennet’s death, Mary is left with no fortune. Rather than relying on direct family members for support, Mary accepts an invitation to stay with a distant relative, Lady Trafford, at the mysterious Castle Durrington. Lady Trafford gifts Mary with private tutoring and personal attention, but Mary cannot ignore Lady Trafford’s lies, secrets, and manipulations, which may put their seaside community at risk from invasion by Napoleon Bonaparte. And when a would-be thief, whom Mary has prevented from stealing her father’s mourning rings, turns up dead on the beach, Mary must jeopardize her position at the castle, her relationships, and her family’s name in order to bring the truth to light.
I came up with the idea for this novel in 2013, thought about it for years, started writing it in late 2017, and then in 2019 finished drafting, queried, and found my agent. After all the work I put into it, it was magical to sign the contract.
What’s up next for The Secret Life of Miss Mary Bennet?
- Working with the art department and marketing department at Tule
- Content edits
- Copy edits
- Proofreading
Meanwhile, I am also working on the second draft of Mary Bennet book 2, in which Mary goes to London and has all sorts of adventures. Onward we go!